Whose Army Are We Feeding?!?!??

You have realized your fridge is empty and that it wont conjure you food. you've gotten that step, but now you have to go fill your fridge back up. Well ever heard of the "warning" don't go shopping when your hungry?. You probably should listen, might save you a few 20 dollar bills that you can use for the insanely high gas prices. Ive seen my folks get tons of stuff that i ask them, are you ever going to use that? ( If you knew my folks, you would realize the list of idiocy does not stop there) I mean, my mother doesn't cook but yet she buys all these ingredients as if she is a gourmet chef, and that most of it we just threw out because it was rotten and now decides she needs to buy it again.The main thing we end up using is the bread, and yet we only buy 2 loaves and have to go back to the grocers when our bread is gone in like a week or less. (Living proof that there is no vaccine for stupidity)......

Not Now Im Busy......

I have to mention some peoples ummmm uh .....strange relationships with their computers. Its like its their sick mother whose on a hospital bed that they cant leave her side. God forbid if the computer actually caught a virus. Their way of living as they know it will be in ruins and they will hop on it faster than they'd probably hop onto anything else like paying bills or taking someone to the hospital. And yes it has happened before...i know someone who didn't want to take someone to the hospital because they were on their computer. Talk about an attachment issue problem, They say space is a dangerous place . . . especially if it's between your ears! I am guessing their right.........

No Stairs Please

Stairs are really keeping shiny these days. I mean how many people actually use them? Why use them when we can use the escalator. Oh yeah, the escalator,our savior of moving up a level in the building. Because who wants to go up the stairs? Actually the funny thing about this little tidbit is then everyone wonders why AMERICA is becoming obese. Gee i wonder. Do not worry people, your not stupid, just possessed by a retarded ghost................

At The Movies

Has anyone else maybe noticed some of the asinine, and total crap that movies have taught us. The little things we would not know without the movies like its ALWAYS possible to park in front of any building you are visiting or a detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty, and looking at it that way kinda gives them a bad name. You can ALWAYS find a chainsaw when you need one, yeah OK like if you don't own one, you will certainly find one lying around. My absolute favorite is that it does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, you have plenty of time because your enemies will patiently wait to attack you one by one dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors. That is so considerate of them not that it would ever happen in the real world. Perhaps ideas such as this are to serve as a warning to others that stupidity really is painful.....

Yummy

I do realize this is a silly question that everyone has probably heard before but have you ever wondered......Who was the first person to see an egg come from a chicken's butt and think, "I'll bet that would be good to eat? Look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out?" Or opened that first 'oyster' and said "My, my, my. Now doesn't 'this' look yummy! All of these things are wrong on so many levels when approached in a such a way. When over thinking these kinds of things, it makes you see mankind in a not so flattering light although sometimes i am not all that sure there is a flattering one......

"Grave Appeal"

Due to the graphic nature of this post..parents please be advised that some of the material may be inappropriate for certain viewers. I am just as open minded as the next person but i have witnessed an appalling practice that certainly gives new meaning to death like i needed new meaning to it. This is not a new thing by any means for i have seen many people do it....Why do people take pictures of their recently deceased relatives in their casket? While i do realize that people want to remember the deceased, i would think you would want to remember them in a happier setting. People that take wakes to such an extreme make me think.... As an outsider, what do they think of the human race?............

Oxygen Please....

This is probably a totally inappropriate subject to broach but i was at the pediatricians office one day with my child when i overheard a conversation between a mother, and her daughter. Now your asking yourself, what is so abnormal about that. Well nothing, it was the topic that caught my attention. The daughter was about three years old, and was holding her private area and her comment to the mother was "mommy my who who hurts".........OK my first question is did she teach her child to call her vagina a "who who"? Exactly who sits around and thinks up these names? Do they have nothing better to do? Is there life on their planet? or oxygen?.........

Babysitting At The OK Corral Part 2

Yes we have finally come back to the perils of babysitting.....And the baby has grown a little to your horror. Thinking you will outsmart the baby this time by staying biting distance away from its teeth as you have seen, now have the ability to pierce skin and cause small blood droplets that may cause you to faint (a little blood and you faint, obviously a male lol). So staying on top of the couch to were the baby is circling you trying to get on the couch so it can commence its attack. After a while you do the one thing you should never do...and you do it again!!!! You divert your attention elsewhere. away from the baby circling you as you underestimate the child. Once you turn your attention something goes soaring through the air colliding horribly into the back of your skull. As you wince at the pain....before you can figure out what it was other objects are being flung at you and you duck behind the couch for cover wondering were the barrage is coming from. Once the artillery has been exhausted you take a chance to look up and once your head pop up a large Lego block hits you in the face and you find out the baby was throwing its toys at you. You get angry again, the baby cries, and now...you have a mess to clean and probably need an icepack. Baby:2 Babysitter:0..........

Brushing

I don't believe it, i was sitting down and i saw a guy brushing his hair like every 2 seconds. It isn't that people brushing their hair in public is a problem, but this is what really got me. He only had about a millimeter long hair. It wasn't long and i just couldn't figure out for the life of me why on earth he was brushing his millimeter long hair. I mean is there knots in it? i don't think his hair is long enough for knots, and how does this guy know he is having a bad hair day? I have long hair but i don't even brush as much as he did that one day than i brush in a whole week. (OK just to clarify there are two writers on this blog and this statement was obviously written by the fat lazy one lol)..........